pRojECt

today had a group meeting to discuss project...
cancelled FYP meeting to spend time on it...
but then the discussion was very slow....
and it wasn't getting anywhere...
so am got pissed about it...
and actually had a discussion on MSN yesterday...
but till today still had not come to a conclusion..
furthermore there is still term paper that we havent touch yet...
and the exams is like in 3 wks time...
it is no wonder that am got pissed...
she really wans to get the projects and reports over and done with...

i feel bad...
cos i had read the case... i know the case...
but somehow i cant seem to contribute much to the discussion...
there are things on my mind and everything...
i know i shld say outloud so all can comment...
but when i need speak...
i stammer...
and all my thoughts are gone...
mind become blank...
and i dunno wad to do...

i really hate this...

i never told anyone about this...
but this is not the first time it's happened to me...
actually it's been like this since i came to this course...

i know why i have become like this...

i am losing confidence in myself...
i'm afraid of giving remarks...
afraid of providing the wrong info...
and i am tinking very little of myself...
with frens like am, fiona, su, winne, etc...
who are doing so much better than i am...
and also because i wan to do well myself...
but i keep disappointing myself in the exams...

i really dislike myself being like this...